Connection Doesn't Happen at Warp Speed; It Requires Space

I am all over the place. Maybe you can relate.

My brain is foggy.

My body is unsteady.

My desires are inarticulable.

My attention and energy are easily distracted and relocated to this or that.

New email.

New text.

New notification.

New January 6 Committee hearing.

I feel as if I have a million important things to do.

And. Also.

Nothing in the world is important at all; we're in the middle of democracies collapsing in an apocalypse on social, political, environmental levels.

So what can I offer you around deeply connecting within, to yourself,

And. Or.

in love, with your partner, over this weekend?

How can I support you to experience the sex you want and the intimacy you desire?

Easy.

It's to remind you that connection requires space.

Time.

Presence.

Connection doesn’t happen at warp speed.

We may not be connected to ourselves because time is in a warp speed expression.

Late stage capitalism is attempting to punish us and recover what it perceives was stolen (ah, the irony) during the COVID shutdowns by forcing hyper-hyper productivity.

(Because before was hyper; this is the next evolution attempt of hyperdrive productivity.)

And what we want is not more things, more streaming options, faster 5G.

We desire connection.

Presence.

To be seen and heard and held despite systems that insist we are machines or batteries from which they can extract labor and resources.

We are energy. We are love. We are nature.

And we feel most alive when we are spacious and in flow, creating, making, being.

So here are four steps to slowing down, connecting, feeling, and taking up space in your life:

STEP 1: Take a breath

Whether it's the body or mind that starts the rush to do all, our body is the one that can slow it back down.

Take a breath.

Take a slower one.

A deeper one. A smoother one. A wider one. A bigger one.

STEP 2: Sigh it out

Keep breathing, and now open your mouth slightly. See if you can soften your jaw.

You can even bring your fingertips to the hinges of your jaw with warmth and presence or massage anywhere along your jaw that feels good or calls for your touch and attention.

(Note: Our jaws are connected to our pelvic floors. A soft, relaxed jaw equates to a soft, relaxed pelvis. Soft, relaxed pelvis equates to more blood flow, sensation, and pleasure.)

On the next exhale, sigh.

Notice your shoulders melt and your neck release.

Inhale.

Exhale again and exaggerate your sigh to release more.

STEP 3: Sound

With your mouth slightly open and your breath deep, inhale and exhale.

This time let your sigh become a sound.

Try reaching for a deep, guttural sound at first.

Then take another inhale, exhale, and make a higher pitched sound.

With a sigh, a low sound, and a high sound in your capacity, keep breathing, and this time let any sound or noise that wants to come out of your mouth come out on the exhale.

Keep doing this.

STEP 4: Move and play

Keep breathing, keep sounding, and now move. Now play.

Inhale.

Exhale.

Sound.

Shake. Twist. Stretch. Rock.

You might shake your hands at the wrist.

Maybe you twist at the waist.

Perhaps you stretch your head on your neck.

Possibly you rock forward and back while swinging your arms.

Do anything that feels good in your body with your breath, with your sound.

Follow your impulses and whims to connect to your body, connect within, and connect to this moment.


Connection requires space. It requires time. It requires presence. It requires permission.

So give yourself permission to slow down, to consciously control where your focus is and where you want it to go and invite your partner to do the same.

Take a walk together. Take a drive to nowhere.

Reclaim your life, your energy, and connection to what matters most:

You and your loved ones.

Offering you so much love as I practice what I share,
Daniela