Blog
9 Qualities for Determining the State of Your Union
"On a scale from 1 to 10, how happy are you as a couple?"
Mr. and Mrs. Smith is a movie that's spoken to me for a long time.
It was trying to tell me something about long term committed relationships.
I sat with it for years before I figured it out.
Even though it's from a cis white heteronormative framing, it's still about two people experiencing what I call The Relationship Journey.
3 Simple Steps To Reignite Love & More in Your Relationship
I see your partner and you and hold what's possible for you both.
I see the excitement and exhilaration of honeymoon, springtime-like love and sex,
especially in the shift to autumn.
4 Steps for Clearing Time To Connect With Your Partner
When your partner and you were dating, you cleared out time to see one another, to do things, to have sex.
Sometimes you gave up sleep or money or a lunch hour or seeing friends to laugh and smile and experience one another.
Connection Doesn't Happen at Warp Speed; It Requires Space
I am all over the place. Maybe you can relate.
My brain is foggy.
My body is unsteady.
My desires are inarticulable.
I was peeing in the car every few seconds from a UTI
Several years ago I developed a UTI so painful that in the car on the way to the emergency room, I was peeing every few seconds onto a stack of cloth diapers I'd placed under me.
The few seconds of relief I had paled into comparison to the sharp, burning, twisting pain I felt.
The UTIs I've experienced I've never directly correlated to having sex either consciously or unconsciously.
Heal Within The Stone Hearth of Your Relationship for Fire and Light
You.
Me.
What do we know about supporting long term relationships to thrive, to flourish...
To experience the fullness of being human...
To explore the richness, depth, passion, and connection of being alive?
5 Steps for Coming into Presence and Connection with Your Partner and Loved Ones
"Wait. Wait. Can you say that again?"
I'm in the kitchen, and my youngest who is eight is next to me saying something about turtles and the beach.
A piece of me is replaying a past conversation with someone else as I pour some tea.
I recognize another piece wants to be in the present and connected to what he's sharing with me.
This is What Fun and Play Have To Do With Sex and Pleasure
I spontaneously went on a road trip to my friend's friend's place The Bearded Lady Pub to have some fun food (think beignets, fried Oreos, Twinkies, churros, cookie dough bites, etc.)
I gave myself permission to follow this whim despite not having any intentions or expectations.
Maybe inspired by Esther Perel's recent 7-day exploration around the art of foreplay...Perel first invites participants to focus on play.
This is How To Return to the Beginning of Sex and Intimacy Within and In Love
Sometimes...
you just have to scrap it all and start at the beginning.
I have triggered tendencies that want to burn bridges and return to ash.
That's not what I'm talking about.
7 Steps for Reclaiming Our Pleasure, Connection, and Interdependence
I need to remind us that sex is important.
Intimacy is important.
Closeness...is important.
We are created for pleasure.
We are designed for interdependence.
"I'm tired" is the new "I'm fine." You're not tired. You're not fine.
I'm tired.
Are you?
I've noticed that for some people "tired" can be code for boredom or pessimism, frustration, irritation, impatience....
Sometimes it encompasses overwhelm, disappointment, doubt, or worry.
This is How To Gently Awaken Your Sexuality with Spring Energy
Feel the sun warming the air...
See the flowers bloom yellow, red, pink...
Taste fresh, dripping fruit...
Inhale freshly cut grass and squeezed lemons...
Here is what I want for us. Are you with me?
Here is what I want for us:
I want a relationship where we experience a connection, a close bond, an attachment.
I want a relationship where I can read your cues around what you need and want, and you can read mine...where we're willing to learn one another's cues and respond to them.
Which is More Closed Off: Your Heart or Your Sexuality?
For just a moment, close your eyes or let them gently unfocus.
Breathe into your heart.
Is it open?
Can you expand and soften into your heart with some ease?
The Most Difficult Season of Your Relationship Might Need Support
You are not alone.
If this has been the most difficult season your relationship has faced...
If this has been the most difficult chapter of your life...
You are not alone.
Gently Support One Another's Bodies and Sexuality with Loving Touch
Sit down with me?
I'm picturing us nestled around a small, square table.
The flat wood is darker, and the texture offers my chest calm and grounding sensations with a reminder of the outdoors.
Maybe you're across from me so we can look at one another.
This Is How You Connect Within...So You Know What You Need and Want
Deep breath.
What do I need to connect within right now...to connect with myself?
Space.
And permission.
Can we just be where we're at...right here, right now?
For a deeper connection within...so you might connect in love with your partner over the weekend...
Do something with me this morning?
Take a moment to perhaps close your eyes or just soften them.
Focus a few moments on your breath.
Why didn't anyone tell me we're all in our individual silos?!???
Hey!
Why didn't you tell me?
I didn't know that we've all been in our own individual silos the last eight months or so.
Whether because of my work with people and relationships...
