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TALKING SEX
A Holding Space Training for Sexual Feedback for Loving Couples
A 75-Minute Guided Sex Practice for Couples
Share your deepest truths around sex & intimacy
Without being shut down, criticized, or told you're wrong…
Without defensiveness, it being taken personally, or getting misconstrued…
Without feeling like your desires and fears don't matter….
Instead, start with communication that feels like unconditional love & support while exploring curious questions for experiencing more pleasure in your body
BY STARTING YOUR SEX PRACTICE
TALKING SEX
A Holding Space Training for Sexual Feedback
A 75-Minute Guided Sex Practice for Couples
Sunday, March 2
On Zoom from 9:00 - 10:15 AM PST
Recording included
MICS OFF, CAMERAS OFF. THIS IS FOR YOU TWO.
For Loving Couples For Whom Sex is Important
People in All Bodies, of All Expressions, and in All Relationship Dynamics Are Invited & Welcome
Early price: $40 USD per couple through February 26
Regular price: $45 USD per couple
FIRST, WHAT IS A SEX PRACTICE?
A Sex Practice is the ritual of your partner and you
routinely co-creating a specific time and place
to clarify, connect, communicate, heal, and/or explore
with the intention of moving toward naked pleasure and connection together.
During this online & guided Sex Practice, playfully learn how to hold space and communicate curiosity around what feels good in your body with your partner without having to worry about their ego or feeling responsible for magically knowing what’s working for them.
This experience will support you to communicate around sex, pleasure, and vulnerable topics. We’ll go through:
A playful holding space training
Exploring four questions in our own bodies that can invite more of what feels good
Asking our partner the same four questions around platonically touching them
FOR QUEER FOLK, ASEXUAL PEOPLE, MARRIED PEOPLE, SEX WORKERS AS WELL AS THOSE PRACTICING CNM OR MONOGAMY
SKILLS & CAPACITIES WE WILL STRENGTHEN:
CLARIFY what kind of touch feels best to you in the moment without needing your partner to guess or read your mind
CONNECT to what it takes and feels like to hold space for your partner with a sense of unconditional love without losing your sense of self
COMMUNICATE curiously with yourself and your partner four questions around what invites more pleasure without taking it personally
HEAL shame, embarrassment, judgement, hurt, avoidance, and disconnection without being the only one who is vulnerable and exposed
EXPLORE a loving space where you can request and offer sexual feedback without getting defensive and feeling rejected OR making yourself small and keeping things to yourself
HERE IS WHAT WE WILL DO IN DETAIL:
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Before you arrive and as we start, you’ll be invited to create a space—ideally in your bedroom, and the couch or kitchen table works, too—where you feel comfortable and safe enough with each other.
You can also bring what invites the most presence and connection for you.
Having a candle to light sets an energetic intention to focus on one another.
Having a hand towel and your favorite unscented, organic massage oil and/or lubricant nearby makes for easier shifts to sexual intimacy if you both want to. -
I will introduce myself and share more around starting a Sex Practice as well as why we're gathered live and online in service of collective belonging.
I’ll invite everyone to turn their mics and video off. -
I’ll next invite you to check in On The Dial from 0 to 10. You’ll ask yourself, “How open are you to having sex right now?
It might be even better to ask yourself, "How open am I to experiencing pleasure right now?"Zero is, “No, thank you. Not right now.”
Ten is “Yes, please. Let’s take off our clothes!”
Anything from 1 to 9 is a willingness, a curiosity, a maybe coming from our sexuality and our body.
Trust the number that comes into your awareness, and if you have a deck of cards handy, pull that number out immediately.
We may feel pressure to change our answer—to make it larger or smaller based on perceived pressure or expectations from our partner or from cultural messages.See if you can pause that and extend an invitation to yourself to go with the first number that comes to mind.
Then you can share that number with vulnerability and courage with your partner, or you don't have to.
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Fifteen minutes in we’ll begin the formal Sex Practice with a guided meditation for meeting yourself and coming into presence and connection as well as naming our intentions for this Sex Practice.
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I’ll guide you to locate a resource within you or just outside of you for any time you feel overwhelmed, panic, or a sense of flashback during the Sex Practice.
We’ll finish by arriving and orienting to the space before we move on. -
Experience a learning process where you intentionally explore communication together by alternating interrupting one another in a light and playful manner before settling into embodying a space for your partner's and your deepest truths to emerge.
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Continuing with verbal guidance from me around touching your own forearm where you'll explore four questions that can direct you toward more of what feels good:
- How is the speed?
- How is the pressure?
- How is the location (of my finger, hand, penis, the toy, etc.)?
- How is the style or stroke? -
Finally, with consent from your partner, you'll touch their forearm while asking and adjusting to these four questions with the intention of inviting them to experience pleasure:
- How is the speed?
- How is the pressure?
- How is the location (of my finger, hand, penis, the toy, etc.)?
- How is the style or stroke? -
The two of you will be given an equal amount of time to share around the following topics:
What did you experience?
What did you feel?
What did you love?
Would you want anything different?
What would support you to feel cared for, supported, safer, and more grounded in yourself and from your partner as you leave the space and head into the rest of your evening?
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To end, you’ll be invited to once again check in On The Dial.
On a scale from 0 to 10, how open are you to having sex right now?Zero is, “No, thank you. Not right now.”
Ten is “Yes, please. Let’s take off our clothes!”
Anything from 1 to 9 is a willingness, a curiosity, a maybe coming from our sexuality and our body.
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As we come to a close, I’ll give you a sense of what to expect while continuing to process and integrate this experience and how to bring it into your life together.
You’ll receive an email from me within 24 hours with our recording and additional offerings for support.